Last week, our 5 year old and I had a rough morning. Miss H often spends time in her own little wonderland, and this can make getting ready for school sometimes stressful. After 30 (!!!) minutes to eat one slice of toast and a pear, repeated requests to get dressed, brush teeth, hair,etc. I came out after getting myself dressed to find that adorable girl singing and playing in her room. No socks and shoes, hair and teeth unbrushed. We had 12 minutes until school started. And the car's battery had died (thanks to an unshut door all night...). I freaked out a bit. Okay, maybe a lot. I yelled. Pretty loud, too. I quickly got H ready, all while expressing my displeasure with her behavior and not being too gentle with that hair of hers. Needless to say, neither of us were in too happy a mood as we left to jog the half mile to the school. (and I, 9 mos prego, was really not happy)
I tried to lighten the mood a bit as we hurried along, not wanting H to go to school with mom yelling at her as her freshest memory. I wasn't very good at it, but I tried. It took me the whole 6 minute walk(jog) to get the frustration out of my system. As we neared the Kindergarten play yard (with time to spare!!), the regret for my behavior really began to set in. I pulled that cute little girl aside, knelt down and looked into those amazing brown eyes and told her that, while we needed to work on getting ready faster in the mornings, I was very sorry for getting so upset and that I shouldn't have yelled. I told her that I still loved her more than anything, even though I sometimes get upset.
Then Miss H wrapped her little arms around me and in my ear I heard what, at that moment, to me, were the two best words in the whole wide world:
"I Know."
Then a quick kiss and off to the playground, but not without a wave and a "bye mom!".
As I walked home (at a slower pace) I felt so much lighter. All I could think about was that even though I am very far from being the perfect mom (many days it feels I am far from being a good mom), and I have a lot to work on, I must be doing something right...after all,
She Knows.
